#HHT, Breaking Dawn, cum, Eclipse, Edward Cullen, Holy hard tool, Little Ashes, manmeat, New Moon, PattinPerv, Pineapples, Rob hot, rob pattinson, Robert Pattinson, Robp33n Wednesdays, Robpeen Wednesdays, Robporn, Robs peen, Robward, RPattz, sexiest man alive, spunk, Team Edward, TheColdShower, Twilight, Very pervy pervs, VPP, VPPs
*looks around* Seems like I am left on my own today eh?
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllllllllll… Let’s make the best of it right?
It’s Wednesday again! And do you know what that means? Screw humpday… It mean’s Robp33n Wednesday!!
PLEASE ONLY CONTINUE IF YOU’RE AT LEAST 18 YEARS OLD! I’M SERIOUS!
I’ve been thinking a lot about this post… Well not the topic really but exactly *what* it was gonna be about.
Firstly I had the genius idea of doing a “p33n vs. pecks reloaded: Take it off Rob” post.
As some of you might now one of our very own chicas *cough* TongueTwied *cough* started a #TakeItOffKellan campaigne because
she is a cheater that cheats on Rob wants to see Kellan take his shirt off during the Armwrestling-Scene in BD II. Don’t ask me why. No idea.
Problem: This is sooooooooooooo not a discussion. We already know who’s gonna win.
So I decided to change the topic and again kiTT was the one that inspired me:
Bleriana: uhm… I’d say Bossward? #ThePlan
TongueTwied: ohhh I see…I mean it’s okay. It’s no NutcrackerWard or anything though. LOL
Bleriana: NAW! NutcrackerWard? bwahhahahaha… Not that I know of ;)
TongueTwied: It’s no EatingMorePineappleWARD
Bleriana: or MySystemIsFullOfPineapplesWARD =?
TongueTwied: LOL! MorePineappleInMeThanAtALuauWARD ?? Well whatever I end up calling him…I probably love him. =)
- this discussion was followed by a NSFW picspam. Go stalk my timeline if you wanna see it. NSFW Picspam her I cum!
Those of you who’ve been living under a rock/were still passed out from Christmas/were in a Robp0rn coma after yesterdays post miiiight not know what we are talking about, but of course we’re not gonna discriminate them because they
lived in isolation from the fandom for a while and therefore have limited knowledge of what is happening in the world around them missed one of the hawtest fics at the moment. We gonna settle for telling them to GO READ IT ALREADY instead! Because that’s what classy h00rs do ;) They help another h00r out.
The one’s who have read it miiiiight be wondering wtf does Bossward have to do with Robp33n Wednesdays. Well actually I really hope you are not wondering how I am connecting those two because that would totes be #VPPfail… js.
Well lemme remind you how these two connect:
“Bel-…you…you don’t really want this.”
I shove him against the wall. The thud sounds through the room.
“Don’t tell me what I want.” I speak against his skin as I tongue and bend and descend…lower, lower.
“But I sure know what you want.” My knees hit the floor. “I’m excellent with non-verbal communication.”
A rhythmic beat resounds in the room and I think it’s the blood rushing through my system but then I realize he’s banging his head against the wall again and again. He’s losing it. I want more.
He’s still nearly fully dressed; I watch his chest rise and fall between partially untucked shirt scraps and draw him out through his open zipper.
My mouth closes around him. He clamps down on my shoulders as if to steady himself, as though the wall isn’t enough to support his weight. He’s leaning on me. Needs me.
Tapping on his belt buckle, I pull back and say, “Off.”
He nods mutely. He complies.
Now, there’s an element to oral sex that might be called worshipful and I’m a fan of it – and even in the pale light it’s clear his cock is worthy of worship, praise, maybe some hymns – but that’s not what I’m here for today. I suck him in, swallow around him, press my tongue flat and create enough suction to rival a Hoover. His knees give a bit, and since his legs are so long it actually puts him at a better angle.
One hand returns to his ass, securing him where I want him and I stroke him with the other and he’s moaning and writhing and I know this is going to be fast.
And I want nothing more.
I pull out all the stops. Tongue his slit. Tight in my mouth. Hint of teeth. In unison, my hand moves from his ass to massage his perineum while I pull him to the back of my throat, hum, and swallow.
Whoo-hoo. Mind over matter. Deep throat. I’ve never been able to do that before.
I hum – sorta, it’s not the easiest thing when your airway is obstructed – and only I know it’s the opening bars of The Battle Hymn of the Republic.
“I…I’m…Christ.” His back is bowed out, arcing, as he twitches and swells. I pull back and he spills onto my tongue and struggles to stop rocking.
He’s gasping for air and his hands are running through my hair, along my face with….reverence?
I stand and spit.
“I’ll add pineapple juice to your breakfasts,” I say, and pat his tie twice, his chest heaving underneath. “Drink it if you ever want that to happen again.”
And there the magical mention was… Bella tells Edward to drink pineapple juice if he wants a repeat of her performance.
Which made me wonder: Is it really true?
Can you really manipulate what a guys (aka Robs) cum tastes like?
I asked around on twitter and all could tell me what the word on the street was but nobody could attest to it 100%.
Let’s clear this out once and for all: Is there a way to improve Spunk Ransom’s spunk-taste? (I honestly doubt it tastes of Rainbows tbh)
And no “word on the street says” please. We want #truefacts here! Because after all Robp33n Wednesdays are ALWAYS scientifically correct….
All in the name of science,
The contest is still going on girls! ONLY 2 DAYS LEFT!!
A couple of weeks ago I realized: I love this blog sooooo much. With all my heart (ok truth be told I don’t just love the blog itself but all the h00rs involved in it in one way or another) but yet I don’t have a shirt to attest my love… Or a coffeemug… Or a refrigerator magnet!
Asking around on Twitter I realized: I’m not the only one who wants that. AND I REALLY WANTS IT! AND I WANTS IT NAO!
The thing is: I don’t have a design to get said things made! This is where you h00rs get into the game:
I’d love you to DESIGN A LOGO!
Go crazy. Go wild. Let your pervy & creative juices flow!!
You could either go for a simple TCS logo OR a VPP logo OR how about a Robp33n Wednesdays logo?
Go ahead and do whatever you feel like doing!
All entries must be submitted to me via e-mail (firstname.lastname@example.org) by the 1st of January. Then I will put them all on the blog and a poll will decide which one’s gonna be the design we will have printed on shirts and other memorabilia!
The winner will be the first one to receive whatever article wanted from “The collection”.
Whatcha waitin 4? Get on it!
I figured -since I am already making you design a logo to print on our TCS memorabilia- I might aswell provide some inspiration. Something to make your juices flowing…